In a message dated
2/17/2004 9:30:08 PM
Eastern Standard Time:
Q: Islam gives
permission to Man that
he can keep four wives.
At same time but woman
can't get four married.
Why?
Bismillah, Al Hamdulilah,
was salat was salam ala
rasoolullah. Allahu 'Alim.
(It is Allah who has All
Knowledge).
First
of all, let us do some basic
research here:
A: Read
surah An Nisa - all the way
through. Then think about
the verses.
Do you
believe that Allah Knows
what He created and He has
revealed the perfect 'deen'?
Do you
know the condition of the
people at the time the order
came to restrict the number
of wives? (Restricted to
only four)
Men
used to bury their daughters
alive in the sand, out of
shame for having something
so low instead of a son.
Women
were treated horribly with
disgust.
Men
could marry as many as they
liked and often owned women
like cattle or sheep.
There
were no laws to protect the
women and they had no rights
at all.
Christians at that time were
holding council meetings to
determine whether or not a
woman even had a soul.
The
church blamed "Eve" the
mother of all humans after
Adam, peace be upon him, for
the "original sin" and
damned her and her seed for
what she had done. (Islam
does not blame Eve for
Adam's sin. Each of them
accepted their own mistake
and repented to Allah and
Allah did forgive them)
Women
were blamed by the Jews for
the "original sin" and as
such they were treated with
disgust.
A
woman's monthly cycle was
considered by the Bible to
be a "curse from God" for
her inequities.
Her
child bearing pains were
also a 'punishment from God'
for her bringing man down
from heaven.
Now
read the verse very
carefully about having more
than one wife. [4:3]
What
does it say? And what do you
understand from it?
Then
read the ayah the forbids
men to marry women who are
already married. [4:24].
Now
read from An Nisa about the
role of men and women.
[4:34]
Do you
understand that one must
take on the role of
supporter, protector,
provider, custodian and
servant to the family (man)?
One
must take on the role of
carrying the child and
delivering it and then
feeding it and raising it to
become a true servant of
Allah. (woman)
Men and
women are not the same.
They
are equal in their beliefs
and good deeds of course.
But still they are not the
same as each other.
Each
one must fulfill their role
as humans.
Islam
is about rights.
Children also have rights in
Islam.
When a
man dies his wealth is left
to his family. How could the
court know who to give the
wealth of a man, if he was
one of several husbands to a
woman?
How
would a child know who his
father was?
No
society ever supported the
concept of a woman being
married to two or more men
at the same time. Almost
every society supported the
concept of a man having more
than one woman.
Islam
came to set things straight.
Women
were given rights.
Men
were strictly ordered to
treat their women with the
very best of treatment.
First
of all, the men had to
divorce their wives, if they
had more than four. So this
was not an order to go out
and get four wives. It was
an order to begin
limitations. And the first
limitation was; No more than
four.
Second,
the limitation of equal
treatment for all of them.
How could a man keep more
than one wife unless he was
exceedingly wealthy and/or
exceedingly strong and
virile?
Next,
the limitation very clearly
states; ".. but if you fear
that you shall not be able
to deal justly (with them)
then only one ..."
Step by
step, the men of Islam have
come to be known today as
the most monogamous of all
men on earth. (we only have
one wife)
Check
for yourself and see. In the
majority of all the Muslim
homes on earth, a man gets
married once, to one woman
and then he stays married to
her until the death of
either himself or his wife.
It is
strange isn't it, a society
like America, that condones
having sex without marriage,
homosexuality, same sex
marriages, sex without
responsibility, children
without fathers and divorces
are more common place than
the measles or chicken pox,
would be so concerned about
the way Islam demands that a
couple be married, the man
actually work instead of the
woman and the woman owns her
own property without giving
anything for the support of
the house or the child, a
child has the right to his
or her own mother raising
them instead of a baby
sitter or day care, father
must support his children,
divorce is hated, marriage
is sanctified.
Compare
the two for yourself and see
which one needs correction.
______________________________________________________
We will be waiting to hear from
you. May Allah Bless you all and
increase you in all that is
good, ameen.
Jazakumallahu khairan was salam
alaykum,
Yusuf Estes
National Muslim Chaplain